A freelance writer, writer, artist, geek, hopeless (and hopeful) romantic, and over-thinker. My website: www.fantasywritingschool.com

And just didn’t realize it

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Picture by Sam Manns on Unsplash

Compulsory heterosexuality is a very real thing. When I was growing up, being gay or lesbian wasn’t even talked about.

The first time I ever heard the word “gay” was when I was seven years old on the bus to school, when a kid used that word to make fun of me. I asked my parents what “gay” meant when I got home, and they told me it meant “happy.” The next day, when that kid called me gay again, I was completely unbothered by it, thinking it was a compliment. He stopped bothering me after that.

Growing up surrounded…

From pseudo-recovery to real recovery

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  • My first post ever was short and sweet, titled “Giving Recovery a Shot,” and simply read:

“Anorexia eventually takes it’s toll on you
I think it’s stolen enough” — July 28, 2015

Pretty straightforward. I agree, my eating disorder has taken a lot away from me. When I wrote this, I did not actually want to recover, but I did want to stay alive, which meant there needed to be changes made.

  • Overnight Oats

Obsessed with this breakfast There are so many variations of it I could probably eat it every morning for the rest of my life — July…

By developing self-respect and gaining awareness.

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Since more recently in my life, I was the spitting image of an anxiously-attached person: terrified of abandonment, ruminating about everything that could possibly go wrong in my relationships, being both passive and passive-aggressive to avoid conflicts, worrying about minor shifts in tone or abnormally short texts (or worse: no texts), crying often due to hypersensitivity and taking things personally, and having low levels of self-esteem and self-respect. All the while, I craved nothing more than closeness, intimacy, and love.

Like most emotional issues, these patterns began to develop during childhood. I had severe separation anxiety regarding my parents —…

What is it that makes fantasy such an appealing genre?

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Picture by Dollar Gill on Unsplash

Fantasy and sci-fi are the fourth most profitable book genres combined, generating 590 million dollars a year. With its many subgenres, including epic fantasy, low fantasy, fairy tales and fables, superhero fiction, steampunk, dark fantasy, urban fantasy, and — my personal favorite — sword and sorcery, the possibilities are endless, confined only by the limitations of the human imagination.

Those of us who read fantasy don’t simply dabble in it, rather, we bask in it, completely immersing ourselves into these fantastical worlds, with their heroic storylines and admirable characters.

But why?

Why does fantasy create such a pleasant response in…

The tales of two unapologetically bisexual artists from the early 1900s

Colette (1873–1954, France): The Writer

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Colette. Picture found here

“You will do foolish things, but do them with enthusiasm.” — Colette

The French writer Sidonie-Gabrielle Colette married her first husband Henry Gauthier-Villars (nicknamed ‘Willy’) in 1893. As it wasn’t as easy for a woman to find success and fame on her own during that time, and because Willy was already in the editing business, Colette had her written works published under his title. This was not new for him, as he frequently hired ghost writers to publish works in his name (the difference being that he paid them). …

And how to know when it’s time to walk away

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Picture by JillWellington on Pixabay

Two years ago, I found myself in a “relationship” that didn’t fulfill any of my needs. I had to change myself to make the relationship “work” (it still wasn’t working), and the only way I was able to get some “love” was when I put myself down, which is a pretty unhealthy situation to be in, as we all want affection from our partners.
At the time, I was determined to be the one to motivate her into opening up and accepting love. …

and How to Incorporate Those Elements into Your Own Worldbuilding

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Picture by B Y on Unsplash

If you’re anything like me, when you love something, you really love it. After watching The Philosopher’s Stone at a young age, I would look out the window at night in anticipation of an owl bringing my Hogwarts letter, run around the house with a stick wand, and dress up as Harry for Halloween ( and for fun). Most of my childhood obsessions have died out.. except for Harry Potter.

As I am currently worldbuilding for my own fantasy series, I’ve been considering what elements I should incorporate — and how — to make it memorable to readers. It was…

Tips to start your novel off strong

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Picture by Douglas Bagg on Unsplash

Your book’s introduction is one of the most important parts you will write. It will determine whether or not a publisher wants to work with you and if a reader will continue reading. In it, the tone for the rest of your book will be set, giving readers a taste of your writing style and what they are in for. For these reasons, many writers find that writing their novel’s beginning is a rather daunting task.

In my previous blog post, I discussed different ways you can begin your book: the mid-conflict beginning, the mundane beginning, the day that changes…

I learned these the hard way, so you don’t have to.

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Picture by Külli Kittus on Unsplash

1. You can’t change someone, but people can change

I know people can change because I have.

I went from being a manipulative, controlling, needy, and anxiously-attached partner to a more secure one: giving more space, demanding less attention, and not worrying so much about things outside my control. Not only did this improve my abandonment anxiety, but it also improved my relationships.

It’s okay to want your partner to change within reason and for self-improvement. After all, we want the best for our relationship — we want it to succeed — and we do so by showing up as our best selves. But unless they are admitting their…

It’s not always easy to put emotions into words.

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Picture by John Jennings on Unsplash

There is something extra special about receiving a love letter; the tangible representation of effort, seeing the words in their handwriting, being able to read it over and over again.. Thought, intent, and effort are all displayed in romantic letters, and they never fail to make me feel genuinely loved.

I like writing love letters, too. It is a way for me to express my love and for my partner to receive my love. …

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